In which I made a bacon candle

Stardate: March 13, 2014
Ninth day of Lent
In which I made a candle out of bacon.

Actually,   I'm in the PROCESS of making a candle out of bacon grease as we speak.  It is cooling.  No, I didn't get the idea off Pinterest, nor have I YouTubed a video of candle making.  Our intrepid forebears had no one to tell them how to milk a cow, no one to explain yeast for bread, or rennet for cheese!   I can make a candle out of bacon fat and scraps of flannel shirt in an old shot glass because my very soul cries out "these are the skills of the ages!  Your ancestors approve!"

It's either a great idea, or a worst idea.  Let's find out!

So, while that bacon fat congeals, I'll tell how we got here.

It's my dad's fault. 

He came over to watch the kids tonight while we parents went out for Very Important Meetings, and he's been reading along with this blog (hi dad!) and asked--perhaps snarkily, for that is his way, and I got it from him--how the 'no plastics thing' was going.  It's hard, I replied, holding up the block of cheese that is still encased in as-yet unexamined saran-wrap.  "How do you deal with cheese?  Or any dairy product?"

"Wax paper" he replied, and thus an argument ensued in which both of us adamantly insisted that our unresearched, entirely biased opinions were correct.  We are good at this.  It is effective familial bonding.  My argument was generally that wax paper is in no way guaranteed to be natural wax, and could well be petroleum based wax in order to achieve food-grade consistency.  His argument was something close to "bees make wax" and "that's how they did it in my day."  This led to further object-proofs such as "rubber comes from trees" and "there are other natural sources of wax" and I rolled my eyes like a teenager and then we ate dinner.

"Computer, what food grade wax paper made of?"
"From Wikipedia:
Wax paper (waxed paper), also known as paraffin paper, is paper that is made moisture-proof through the application of wax.(THAT is a perfect circular definition.  Wax paper is paper applied with wax.  Thank you.)
The practice of oiling parchment or paper in order to make it semi-translucent or moisture-proof goes back at least to medieval times.  (This explains my dad's argument, as clearly this was the practice when he was a child.  Many a candlelit night he spent, watching the monks rub seal oil into the precious paper wrappings for the winter stores.  Perhaps, had he proved himself worthy, he could have been an apprentice wax-paper maker.  Alas, his skills were subpar, and he was forced to become an engineer).  Paper impregnated or coated with purified beeswax was widely used throughout the 19th century to retain or exclude moisture, or to wrap odorous products. (ah, yes, here are the bees.  Begrudging point for dad.)
 Gustave Le Gray introduced the use of waxed paper for photographic negatives in 1851.^[1] (clever.)

Natural wax was largely replaced for the making of wax paper (or paraffine paper) after Herman Frasch developed ways of purifying paraffin and coating paper with it in 1876.^[2]"

 I win!  Oh you could argue that we're both right -- don't. 

According to this article from E-How, the wax/paraffin is this:

Basic Paraffin Wax

• Basic paraffin wax is a by product of petroleum or crude oil distillation. (See?  Right there?   That's when I won the argument.  It's not fully clear yet, I just wanted to point it out.)  Other ingredients may include synthetic resins and oil such as palm oil. (Ok.  Technically palm oil is a natural oil, like olive, so here's the tiny sliver of my dad being occasionally right).  Basic or non-food grade paraffin may be used in candle making, as an adhesive or for various industrial applications.

Refined Paraffin Wax

• Refined or food-grade paraffin wax is also a by-product of petroleum refining. Impurities removed, the refined wax may be bleached. Food-grade paraffin is used as a coating to preserve produce such as apples, citrus fruits and cucumbers (WAIT.  You mean to tell me that they've ruined my fruit with plastics??  I mean, fine gradation of definitions here, but if I'm considering 'plastic' most any petroleum product or by product--and admittedly, this is overbroad--then YES, they have ruined my apples by coating them in food grade petroleum based paraffin.  Do they even need to acknowledge this, like on an ingredient list?  If...you know...apples had ingredient lists.)  It may also be used to provide a coating to hard cheeses such as Edam and to provide a glossy finish to candies. Refined paraffin may be an ingredient in chewing gum. Although food-grade paraffin is sold as a sealant for home canning, the USDA no longer promotes its use because of mold issues. Food- grade paraffin is also used as an emollient for lipsticks, lotions, and other beauty products.

Possible Toxicity (because, of course).

• Some scientific studies question the safety of paraffin wax, especially when burned. Dimethyl sulphoxide, a potential carcinogen, is an additive to some paraffin waxes. Benzene and toluene, two additional potential carcinogens, are emitted from burning paraffin candles. (so, I can expect toluene to leach from polystyrene, PVC and candles.  Excellent.  I would, however, point out that this article does not give me any citations for these studies.  To the intarwebs!)

 This report on a 2007 Okometric candle-burning German study found that "in addition to demonstrating that the combustion byproducts of all major candle waxes are virtually identical in composition and quantity, the study reconfirms the lack of health or air-quality concerns with candles."   Oh, well then.  I'll continue burning candles.  Thanks.  Only I DO note that toluene isn't one of the mentioned compounds studied, though this might be ok, if toluene is as closely related to "polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons" as their rhyming names may indicate--acenaphthene, flourene, phenanthrene, etc, read it yourself on page 2.  Of course, the industry funded this study, so maybe take it with a grain of salt?

THIS 2009 study by South Carolina State University seems to contradict it the Okometic German Candle study (and I point out, the 'candle industry' vigorously points back to their own 2007 study to refute the 2009 study).  The intrepid  Dr. Ruhullah Massoudi is the study's author, and can be reached at (803) 536-7112 or rmassoudi@scsu.edu for questions.  He says:

 "The candles were placed in an enclosed specially constructed chamber for up to six hours to trap and test the emitted gases of the burning candles. A GC/MS test was conducted to analyze the contents of gaseous products. The chromatograms of the paraffin candles revealed some undesired chemicals, such as alkans, alkenes and toluene, all reported to cause harmful effects to humans.
...None of the vegetable-based candles produced toxic chemicals,” he added. 

Of course, Dr. Massoudi has an agenda, like everyone does: he wants to raise awareness and promote agriculture.  At least he admits it.

All this talk of natural vs. petroleum based candles got me thinking about my dependency on the petroleum industry, and how I might work to become more self-sufficient.  How did my forebears make light?  The festival of Hannukah celebrates the oil that did not give out in the temple lamp.  So light was made out of burning oil, yes, and tallow.   That's animal fat.

I had bacon with dinner.  Now I know full well that the temple lamp was not bacon grease, obviously.

Buuuuuuuuuuut....

Can I make a bacon-grease candle?  Oh, my kingdom for a gas chromatograph/mass spectrometer!  How can I tell if such a candle releases dangerous chemicals?  Will it smell like heaven, or hell?

Whelp, my bacon candle has congealed, let's find out.  For Science!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Actually, it took a surprisingly long time to catch fire, said the pyromaniac, nonchalantly.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 BOOM!  "Natural" candle of pork tallow (take THAT Laura Ingalls Wilder).   It doesn't smell like much of anything really.  I mean, you can smell bacon fat, but it's hard to tell if it's more than it smelled like bacon fat from before, when you know, I just had it in a pan in the kitchen.  It did have a few moments of GIANT FIRE and LOTS OF BLACK SMOKE, but my husband helpfully points out that I have not appropriately trimmed the wick, and maybe in the future I should choose a glass container with a more stable base.   You live and learn.

So, what SHALL I do as an alternative for my cheeses?  Can one still find a 'natural' wax paper?

And how, if at all does this relate to Jesus?

I'm certain it does, but right now, I'm tired, and I just made a bacon candle, so that's the extent of my theological exploration tonight: anything is possible, if only you believe. 

Much love,
Marie